Grief

I started to wonder if I might be developing depression, and how I could tell the difference between grief and depression. I found an explanation of 15 warning signs of depression. It said that if you experience five of them in two weeks, you meet the criteria for clinical depression. I nervously went through them and found that I have experienced three (four if you include irritability as a side effect of Solu-Medrol... which I had, according to my friend). Whew. And the three I had were all symptoms of MS, such as being tired and having pain. Double whew.

Well, then I wondered what I should be doing as far as grieving, if I'm going about it correctly. How to move through the stages. What to expect. Whether what I'm feeling is normal.

I found this website: http://helpguide.org/mental/grief_loss.htm

It was helpful. I found that my instincts were correct regarding not wanting to medicate away the grief process:


As a general rule, normal grief does not warrant the use of antidepressants. While medication may relieve some of the symptoms of grief, it cannot treat the cause, which is the loss itself. Furthermore, by numbing the pain that must be worked through eventually, antidepressants delay the mourning process.


Ha! Take that, Dr. Gabby. Pfft.

I could not believe how perfectly the list "Common Symptoms of Grief" captured what I have felt. Even anxiety, as a component of fear. True. My anxiety occurs when I think about my future with MS. Or my finances with MS! Definitely fear-related. I remember one night I could not sleep and I made a list of my feelings. I was surprised how many began with "I'm scared because..." Yes, I am scared.

But I found that I am doing everything listed under both of the "Coping with grief and loss" tips. That was a relief. At least I am doing what I can and should to move through this process.

And I did not have the symptoms that suggest depression and not just grief. Idiot Dr. Gabby was wrong about that, as well.

That website also has an article on supporting a grieving person. http://helpguide.org/mental/helping_grieving.htm

I just emailed friends and family about it. A little anxious... But I need them to know how to handle me.